A Christmas Eve poem from an anonymous inmate

Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the cells,
The convicts were locked down
Madder than hell.
Except for the lifers
Kicked back on their bunks
With heads filled with visions
Of all of these grumps.
When suddenly from the roof top
There arose such a roar
That the cops thought
It must be a riot for sure.
The goon squad came running
Ready to hit
And the Sergeant yelled out,
“Who started this shit?”.
“It came from the roof,”
Sniveled some low life snitch.
“Must be a break out.
Oh! Son of a bitch!”
They climbed to the rooftop
By way of the stairs
And found a fat freak
In bright red underwear.
“Ho! Ho! Ho!” said the dude,
“I’m here on the scene”.
“Good Lord,” said the Captain
“We’ve captured a Queen!”
They yelled, “Hey you in the sleigh,
Get your hands on the wall.”
Then slapped on the cuffs
And searched him an all.
They booked him, and threw him
In the hole with a kick;
Well, so much for Christmas
They’ve busted St. Nick!