3rd Oct 04
Odds & Ends
I am enjoying the vegetarian chow. I’ve been receiving rice, beans, lentils, potatoes, onions, and apples. My gauntness is disappearing.
Manny met his nemesis in the form of a young guard.
“Fuck you, toots [derogatory or pet name used for a woman]," Manny yelled at Officer Schill.
“You think yer fuckin’ crazy! Well, I’m fuckin’ crazy as well! Only difference is I’m wearing this fuckin’ uniform!”
“I love you, toots,” Manny said.
“You wanna fuck with me do ya? Oh, you’ll see.”
And Manny did see. Manny and his cellmate, Scooby, were stripped-searched - including a foreskin search for Manny - and their property was confiscated for three days, much to the delight of my neighbours who enjoyed the spectacle.
Timmy the Wood was released on probation and Daniel was moved to a part of SMU that houses higher-classification inmates.
After much goading, my neighbour, Barbarian, revealed the details of a legendary fight that he was in against multiple assailants in a prison chow hall. The battle will be detailed in an upcoming blog.
The recent thunderstorms caused a variety of insects to take refuge in our cell this week, including tiny metallic-coloured wasp-looking things, black moths, black and brown earwigs, a winged ant, a cricket and several unidentifiable others. Penguin pinched the ant to demonstrate that it wouldn’t sting him. He was right. The ant promptly bit him instead causing a
centimetre-wide blister. The cricket was on its back and looking deathly, so I placed it next to a slice of orange. I watched its mouth go to work on the orange and it came back to life. It then proceeded to straighten out its bent and twisted antennae for the next four hours, until they were as good as new. Finally, it did something I can't do, it freed itself from this cell, jumping and chirping happily as it made its exit.
I am awaiting a letter from Frankie, to find out if his trial proceeded as scheduled and what the outcome was.