20 Oct 07

To Kiss Xena?

“My friend, Barry in Tonopah, told me someone commented on a Royo Girl blog that I should get a kiss from you before I’m released,” I said to Xena.
“Listen, honey,” Xena said. “I’ll give you a big ol’ kiss. I’ll slip some tongue down your throat too. And while I’m at it, I’ll slip my panties in your pocket so you have something to remember me by when you get out. That way you can tie my panties to the corner of your pillow, so when you go to sleep at night you can smell my taint."
“Taint?”
“Taint my ass. The only problem is the panties are gonna look like a gunny sac. I can’t help it, I have a big package. I used to tie myself off to the side of my leg, but my leg would always fall asleep. I had problems with my knees once and I realised it was 'cause every time I jumped out of bed my penis would slap one knee or the other. The only good thing about it is: I am never weaponless. Everyone knows Xena carries a big glove.”
A passing female guard said, “ That’s a lotta info there, Xena.”
“I’m,” Xena said, “gonna give the Brit plenty to remember me by – including a kiss. Royo Girl ain’t got nothin’ on this.” Xena spanked his behind.

Is granting Xena a kiss the right thing to do on the eve of my release? And what kind of kiss do you recommend?

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Copyright © 2006-2007 Shaun P. Attwood

9 comments:

joannie said...

Don't miss a final tea party with the lovely Lady Marmalade, my friend! Nothing better than brown sugar in Earl Grey ;-)

AndrewM said...

I feel that a firm handshake would be most appropriate.

Cool Hand said...

A brief nod, accompanied by a wry smile would be the best thing all round - after all, you are British.
Luke

dirtos said...

a peck on the cheek and a sneaky arse tweak would probably suffice.
That or a rigorous bout of buggery. The choice is yours....

Anonymous said...

A hug and handshake is appropriate whether he/she is a he or a she! lol

Just because Xena is the most female in the place - doesn't mean you have to make out with her.... Being a best friend, a hug, peck or handshake is fine.

Don said...

Do it! Sometimes you just got to say WTF!!!

Anonymous said...

All comments above are very funny. I think Jon is clever and playing us all, he will twist this thing so bad...keep us all guessing until for ever.
We will never know. And that is how it should be !
Might I add, if you were both French this whole silly question about kissing would not even occur.
Men women and "other" kiss on each cheek (2 kisses) all the time. A mark of respect.
It has been superb reading you !

Anonymous said...

In the netherlands it is three kisses on the cheek - left, right and then left. Being British myself I would opt for a firm handshake.

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