20 March 06

Ogre Confronts Two Tonys

Thundering through the chow hall toward Two Tonys strode Ogre.
“There’s that old motherfucker who started shit just 'cause I wuz goin’ thru the laundry,” Ogre yelled at Two Tonys.
The crowd divided into three: California gang members behind Ogre, local lifers and murderers behind Two Tonys, and the rest - blood-hungry spectators.
“This big-headed motherfucker,” Two Tonys said, pointing at Ogre’s face, “wanted to kill me over the laundry.”
“You fuckin’ started it!”
“And you insulted me by callin’ me a CO, and threatenin’ to put me somewhere there’d be tubes in my fuckin’ nose. Have you looked under your nose lately? Your moustache looks like a womb broom you haven’t washed since you’ve been down. I can see nits in it, and lice crawlin’ round yer fuckin’ head.”
“Why you gotta be actin’ like a cop around the laundry? Whattaya tryin to do, earn parole? You ain’t gettin’ parole. This motherfucker's servin’ natural lifes – he ain’t ever gettin’ out. He needs to stop actin’ like a fuckin cop.
“Lemmetellyasomethin’, motherfucker: if you’d wash your hands and face, and stop blowin’ snot all over the place, you could handle my fuckin’ laundry.”
“How about I just straight kill you and stick yer laundry up yer ass, you old motherfucker.”
“We all know you ain’t gonna kill nothin’, motherfucker. The only thing yer gonna kill, motherfucker, is a fuckin’ extra chicken breast if some motherfuckin’ fool gives you one at chow.”
“You need to watch yer back, motherfucker.”
Sensing rising tension, Officer Redrock shouted, “Chows over. Everyone back to your houses and lockdown!"

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Copyright © 2005-2006 Shaun P. Attwood

3 comments:

Chris Hawthorne said...

I'm worried for Two Tony's safety! From the sounds of it, Ogre isn't a man to be messed with!

Shaun, you gotta save him!

Anonymous said...

That is how things go down in the pinta ese. It is going to be interesting to see how this plays out. I think they might square up and take care of it one on one. That is in the best interest of both of them to squash it.
-San Diego Joe

AndrewM said...

I'm not worried about Two Tonys. The guy's a legend. He's just seeing how far he can wind Ogre up.