From Xena (Letter 4)

Xena - A transsexual giant and Wiccan priest. The charismatic leader of Cult Of Xena (COX). Tattoos include a wasp on Xena’s penis and ant trails running up Xena’s legs. Recently cut off a testicle and almost bled to death.


Dear Shaun,

I am filing a lawsuit in order to force the State of Arizona to allow me a sex reassignment surgery. My goal is to leave prison as a female. No one has ever tried this before me. I’ll be the first! I am also having my name changed and filing two other lawsuits of which I will not disclose at this time.

I was thinking since my breasts are getting larger, I could utilize them by attaching sandpaper within my cleavage and using it to sand down the Popsicle sticks we use to make our boxes. In this way I could use my hands for gluing and cutting. Of course, the downside would be wood dust inside my belly button. That always sucks!

The name of the drawing I’m sending you is “Moon Nymph.” The feathers are 13, the number of moons in one year. I don’t know how to draw water and I suck at landscapes. I am better with people and animals. The spear in the water is the symbol of masculinity, and the circle with the cross in it is the symbol of earth. She dances in water, which is emotions and purification. The volcano is strength and purification. The moon is emotion. She hides with her towel that which I find distasteful in myself. She is how I envision myself in the future. She is me, a self-portrait, a dream…

Joe Arpaio is sheriff again. It seems that Arizona is a state where if you are corrupt, you might as well be in law enforcement otherwise you’ll go to prison. Arizona loves corrupt law enforcement!

I am doing horrible here. This place really sucks! However I am trying to utilize my time as best I can. I purchased a language set (A Living Language) for Spanish. I am trying to learn. I am also waiting on Latin and German. I hope that some day I can visit Europe. I want to be able to converse with the people there.

I hope you like everything I send you. I am going to try and be more of a friend and write more.
I am truly sorry about the death of your literary agent. It seems I don’t know the best of times to write my frustrations. I believe the next world is a more beautiful place than this one.
I love and miss you. You are my friend, and you will always be my friend.
You are always in my thoughts and dreams.
Tell your mum and father I say hi and I send my love!




Our friends inside appreciate your comments.

Email comments and questions for Xena to or post them below. To post a comment if you do not have a Google/Blogger account, just select anonymous for your identity.

Shaun P. Attwood


Anonymous said...

thats a pretty damn good drawing Xena!!!

Anonymous said...

HAHAHA! Shawn, you are darling, you are really, but i am wondering if you are a closet homosexual myself????

Toni 4 Prison Reform

Anonymous said...

the drawing is awesome! i want to see more...

Cindy in CO

Jon said...


Well, Frankie said I would turn gay after 5 years of being in prison, or at the very least go with cheetos. After 5 years, I just missed women more than ever and didn't feel the need to go with men - much to Frankie's disappointment.

Shaun Attwood

Suzanne said...


Your artwork is beautiful.

Sue O. (aka Joannie, SS) said...

Hey Xena-definitely a psychological and emotional self-portrait. It expresses a lot, which is more important than getting stuff perfect. Hope you're well!

Anonymous said...

xena i love u my sister and u r beautyfull!!!

Anonymous said...

Xena---That is a good drawing,I too would like to see more.
Awesome to hear from you, keep up the hope and good luck with the lawsuit.
And Haha about the sandpaper!


Anonymous said...

The drawing expresses great depth, however I have to say that hacking oneself about gives me some cause for concern.

My own experience has been that, having found much about myself that I disliked, the path to growth lay in learning to love myself - EXACTLY AS I AM.

From your drawing I can see that you are connected to spirit, and my suggestion is this:- look within, ever deeper - for only there will you find what it is you seek.

Why is it you need to be locked in a cage, when your spirit can fly in the sky?

Why is it you need to harm yourself, when your spirit can lift others with one of your smiles?

Yes, life can hurt us, but it is not what happens to us, but how we respond to it, that defines who we are.

Ask yourself this, Xena - What is your life mission?

Good luck! Zen :-)

Anonymous said...

Xena sounds RAD! I love her already!!