30 June 05

A Peculiar Passion

George - who was formerly a funeral director - divulged that he went to the same embalming school as a high profile female nechrophile.

“Which school did you guys go to?”
“The Dallas Institute of Funeral Services.”
“In the eighties.”
“How did you find out that she was having sexual realtions with corpses?”
“She got busted and it was on the news.”
“I’m wondering, exactly how does a woman have sex with a dead body? Can you detail how she did it?”
“Yes. She used the embalming machine, which had variable rates of pressure and flow, to isolate the arteries so as not to swell portions of the body seen at an open casket viewing. She used embalming fluid to enlargen the penis, which would sometimes swell up much larger than normal - more than blood would - and then she would get on top, after the embalming had taken place and, I assume, ride herself to an orgasm.”
“That’s incredible. When you were a funeral director, did you see many aroused corpses?”
“No. You’re not supposed to turn the machine up that high.”
“Okay. How did she get caught?”
“She stole a body, a casket and a hearse. The authorities found her and the corpse naked in the back of the hearse, and she confessed to double-digit counts.”
“Where was she when she was arrested?”
“In California, I think…Sacramento.”
“Was she sentenced to prison?”
“I believe so.”
“For how long?”
“I don’t know.”
“Alright. Thanks for the unusual story.”
“You’re welcome.”

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Copyright © 2004-2005 Shaun P. Attwood


Anonymous said...

Omnia vincit amor, et nos cedamus amori...

rockmother said...

Imagine how many people have done that and haven't got caught! I bet it is more common than we all think. I am glad you sound a bit more relaxed than in the last place. You write really clearly and well. Good luck and take great care.

Anonymous said...

Putting aside my personal disgust and abhorrence of the topic here, you most certainly seem at ease writing about such things. However, perhaps the utilization of aroused in relation to your own response on the matter is dubious to say the least. Unless........