Prison Survival Advice by Shaun Attwood of Banged Up Abroad
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From T-Bone (Letter 34)
T-Bone is a massively-built spiritual ex-Marine, who uses fighting skills to stop prison rape. T-Bone’s latest letter:
I’d like to detail how things really are
here in Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s jail. It all starts with being let out of our
cells at 7 AM. Then, the guards lock us down to feed us hard old bread that has
been left in a freezer (for weeks we’ve been told). When we bite into it or try
to pull a piece off it, it falls apart like dry leaves on a tree that has had
no water. It just crumbles. The peanut butter is all oil or water when it too
thaws out.
People walk around hungry all of the
time, begging the guards for food or trying to steal from each other or the
guards. Grown men walk around in circles all day in the dayroom, or they try to
play games or work out to take advantage of the weaker guys. There is a lot of
pain in this place, a lot of fear and doubt, and a lot of hope has been crushed
by the lack of compassion and the absence of a good meal and because we are
never allowed to go outside to receive fresh air and sunshine.
I had to intervene in a dispute because
of the conditions here. A guy was taking out his frustrations on another guy
who could barely walk. He was blaming him for all of the bad food and the lack
of fresh air. Another guy started to blame Obama for the ills of this place. Another
said it’s the Mexicans fault. Another said it’s the whites. Then everyone went
to their respective racial gangs and looked angrily at each other all day.
This place is always ready to explode
for any reason. If a guard is having a bad day, he’ll find any reason to lock
us down for the eight hours we are supposed to have access to the dayroom. Some
guys cannot wait to go to court, so that they can move around and not breathe
in the pink fibres that come through the ventilation system. They have a
problem with mice in here, which carry all kinds of disease.
It’s remarkable how the human mind works
under stress. A lot of men sit around and hate and dwell on evil things or things
from their past. That’s how some get comfort of solace. Others turn to God. God
has given me peace and has done so much for me that people here come to me for
advice and direction. I know it’s him who is at work in me and through me. You,
Shaun, and all of my readers out there on the Internet are a godsend. I thank
him and you all.
In the evening, we get our other meal, dinner, which even the guards and the people who cook it call slop. It is
something to behold. Sometimes it has rocks in it, a lot of times hair. It has
recently tasted like soap. They won’t give us anything else. It’s like a game
to old Sheriff Joe Arpaio and his underlings. The beans aren’t even cooked. They
are hard and they too have rocks in them at times. It’s so bad that the guards
won’t eat it. They shake their heads at it. They give us a pad of fake butter
to put on the old bread and we drink water.
When we complain, the guards say to put
in a grievance form or they threaten to put us in lockdown for causing a
disruption when the only thing we did was tell them that the food is nasty.
Just the other day, another guy was
found dead in this place because of the conditions. That’s two dead in 3½ weeks.
It’s unreal at times.
There’s so much hate and emptiness
because a lot of the guards assume everyone is guilty even though we are
unsentenced. Yes, there are plenty of guys in here who are guilty, but no one
should be forced to eat food like this in the United States of America, which I
fought for as a Marine. I’m starting to think that Arizona is no longer in the United
States. Although many of us have committed crimes, treating us like this is
inhuman. Men act like animals because of the subhuman conditions. I fear my
words really don’t express the depth and horror of the situation here. It’s
absolutely sickening.
One of the ways they manage the
prisoners is they have hundreds of men locked up on psychiatric medication. It’s
all a moneymaking operation for Sheriff Joe Arpaio and the drug companies at
the tax payers’ expense.
Most of the guys who are not on
psychiatric medication are on heroin and crystal meth. A guy had some dope, heroin
and speed, hid up his butt, which the guards had brought in for him. You should
have saw how the guys who are addicted to it acted. They were like a bunch of
hungry dogs who haven’t eaten in days. The guards know when this place is
flooded with dope. They sit back and watch as people try to kill themselves.
If they obeyed basic human rights and
allowed us sunshine, fresh air and reasonable food, they wouldn’t have a lot of
the trouble that happens here. People wouldn’t want to lose what they have by
causing enough trouble to go to lockdown.
I will soon write more about other
things that have happened here.
Steel embrace,
T-Bone
My book Prison Time includes how I met T-Bone
Shaun Attwood
Book Giveaway
Here are six ways to get a free copy of my latest book, Hard Time 2nd Edition.
1 Enter this Goodreads Giveaway to win a signed copy.
2 Answer this question at Total Crime to win a signed copy: Competition now closed
3 Prisoners Abroad in this article have launched a competition to win signed copies of Hard Time 2nd Edition. Details are on their Facebook wall. Competition now closed
4 One For Ten - a wonderful group of death-penalty activists out of London, who I have met and know personally - are offering signed copies of Hard Time 2nd Edition as a perk to anyone who donates £50 to their latest kickstarter campaign.
5 If you are in the UK and you buy books on Amazon UK, you may be able to qualify for a free signed copy of Hard Time 2nd Edition if you are willing to spend a few minutes posting some reviews. Please email me for more details: attwood.shaun@hotmail.co.uk
6 If you are satisfied with a digital copy, please use any of the links below to get a free version of Hard Time 2nd Edition, which you can download to any device, Kindle, phone, PC...
FREE DOWNLOAD AVAILABLE: UK Kindle USA Kindle iTunes Kobo Smashwords (download to any computer, phone or device)
If you do read Hard Time 2nd Edition, please keep me posted on what you think of it.
Shaun Attwood
1 Enter this Goodreads Giveaway to win a signed copy.
2 Answer this question at Total Crime to win a signed copy: Competition now closed
3 Prisoners Abroad in this article have launched a competition to win signed copies of Hard Time 2nd Edition. Details are on their Facebook wall. Competition now closed
4 One For Ten - a wonderful group of death-penalty activists out of London, who I have met and know personally - are offering signed copies of Hard Time 2nd Edition as a perk to anyone who donates £50 to their latest kickstarter campaign.
5 If you are in the UK and you buy books on Amazon UK, you may be able to qualify for a free signed copy of Hard Time 2nd Edition if you are willing to spend a few minutes posting some reviews. Please email me for more details: attwood.shaun@hotmail.co.uk
6 If you are satisfied with a digital copy, please use any of the links below to get a free version of Hard Time 2nd Edition, which you can download to any device, Kindle, phone, PC...
FREE DOWNLOAD AVAILABLE: UK Kindle USA Kindle iTunes Kobo Smashwords (download to any computer, phone or device)
If you do read Hard Time 2nd Edition, please keep me posted on what you think of it.
Shaun Attwood
Greetings from the Abyss by Jack (Part 21)
Jack is serving life without parole, and has terminal cancer. Throughout my incarceration, Jack was a positive influence. He encouraged me to keep writing, to enter short-story competitions, and we proofread each other’s chapters.
While at work, I began experiencing bouts of dizziness, confusion, slurred speech, and intense throbbing pain on the right side of my head. The left side of my face and left arm went numb, and to a lesser extent, my left leg. Once again, I was taken and hooked up to an IV, but this time I was given several medications, both orally and intravenously.
While at work, I began experiencing bouts of dizziness, confusion, slurred speech, and intense throbbing pain on the right side of my head. The left side of my face and left arm went numb, and to a lesser extent, my left leg. Once again, I was taken and hooked up to an IV, but this time I was given several medications, both orally and intravenously.
After the pain had somewhat subsided, I
was kept there for a few hours for observation. One of the male nurses that I
have known for about 10 years came over and spent some time with me to help
alleviate some of my concerns, and to just keep an eye on me in case my
condition took a turn for the worse. He said that I would probably be told
something different, but the general opinion was that I had experienced a
transient ischemic attack (TIA). He said that this was not unusual when
considered in context with the type of cancer I have.
I asked why I wasn’t taken to the
hospital if this was a TIA. Evidently, the underwritten policy with Corizon
Health is that unless the inmate suffers a massive stroke or does not respond
to the anticoagulant drugs and beta blockers, he is kept on site and under
observation.
After a few more hours of laying there,
watching the IV drip and contemplating the fragility of the human body and the
obvious damage that I have caused through neglect and abuse, the doctor showed
up to enlighten me on my condition. The official diagnoses: severe migraine and
dehydration.
He lectured me on staying properly
hydrated and indicated that the dehydration had caused the migraine; consequently,
I had caused this problem due to my inability to maintain proper hydration in a
desert environment. What a joke.
I was so disgusted with his obvious
attempt to shift responsibility onto me that I just lay there and ignored him. At
one point during his diatribe, I did interrupt him when he stated that I needed
to consume 60 to 80 ounces of water each day. Fed up with his sanctimonious
attitude, I laid into him with my personal consumption habits.
It was ridiculous of me to do so knowing
that it would have absolutely no effect on my current situation, but it was
satisfying getting him to shut up for a moment. The incredulous look on his
face when I told him that I don’t drink soda or Kool-Aid and that I only
consume 20 ounces of coffee or tea each day, and the remaining 120 ounces of
fluid I consume every day is water. I told him that I was tired and no longer
wanted to hear him bleat out the Corizon party line to justify their refusal to
provide the nationally recognised standard of healthcare. I’m sure I came
across as surly, but I didn’t really care.
Although I hate to admit it, over the
last couple of months, I have found that I tire easily. It has become
progressively more difficult for me to work more than a few hours each day. I
recently discussed this issue with my boss and we have decided that it would be
best if I only work the morning class.
Shaun, thank you for setting up the page so that your readers may donate if they are so inclined. I guess I am still
cynical that anyone would want to donate anything because of my background and
crimes, but then again I am always being amazed at the generosity of strangers
and the level of compassion and understanding that at times seems to spring
forth in very bleak and barren environments.
Shaun Attwood
Dawn of a New Adventure (Part 16)
Pics taking delivery of 5,500 copies of Hard Time 2nd Edition at my warehouse space. The majority are being donated to prison charities and state schools. Please like my publishing company, Gadfly Press UK, on Facebook and Twitter.
Hard Time 2 is now available worldwide on Amazon, UK paperback, UK Kindle, USA paperback, USA Kindle,
Shaun Attwood
Hard Time 2 is now available worldwide on Amazon, UK paperback, UK Kindle, USA paperback, USA Kindle,
From T-Bone (Letter 33)
T-Bone is a massively-built spiritual ex-Marine, who uses fighting skills to stop prison rape. T-Bone’s latest letter:
Would you believe a guard read about me
at Jon’s Jail Journal! The guard turned the other way while I dealt with the
guys who were out to hurt me. I went right in and hit the smallest one with a right
hand. His head hit the wall. Down he went. The others just stood there for a
second and that was their mistake. On a mission for God and country, I laid
into them as US Marine.
These other black punks came to the door
and said, “Hey, man. It’s your pod now. It’s your pod.”
“Now hear this,” I said. “Attention on
deck, you jokers. If the Army and Navy ever look on heaven’s scenes, they will
find the streets are guarded by United States Marines.”
Now they think I am going to run the
place, but I am not going to lower myself to their standards. I am not a hero. Those
men and women out there working and taking care of their families and serving God
are the real heroes.
Each one teach one.
Strength and honour.
Steel embrace.
T-Bone
Shaun Attwood
From T-Bone (Letter 32)
T-Bone is a massively-built spiritual ex-Marine, who uses fighting skills to stop prison rape. T-Bone’s latest letter:
They brought a guy in from lockdown, who
thought he was the stuff. He zeroed in on a young kid. He actually walked up to
the kid, gave him some food, and started to horseplay with him.
The kid was hungry because they don’t
feed us worth a damn in here. The kid was thinking, Wow! This guy is cool.
I was hoping the kid wouldn’t eat any of
the stuff, but he did. He went into cell 2 out of view, and the guy was on him.
It was so damn sick.
The guy hadn’t thought about God. I
walked over there with no fear. Several other sickos were telling me to mind my
own business. They were about to jump me. Man, it got real and I mean real. I
realised that I was being set up, and I started to pray.
The guards came in to do a security walk.
They saw the kid all red-faced and bleeding. They hauled the kid and the guy
out of here real fast. They locked us down to investigate what had happened. They
let us back out 40 minutes later.
I knew it was on, and I had a better
idea of who had stolen my store. I thought I knew before, but I realized it was
three of them. I had underestimated their desire and passion to hurt me.
I am going to clamp down on these guys
before I write more, and I won’t be taking them lightly.
Shaun Attwood
Hard Time 2nd Edition (2014) - Locked Up/Banged Up Abroad Raving Arizona
Click here for a FREE ebook version available for Kindles, all devices and PC's.
The 2nd edition is rewritten in the present tense and vastly expanded.
English Shaun Trilogy Book 2.
Shaun Attwood
The 2nd edition is rewritten in the present tense and vastly expanded.
Shaun Attwood
Your Life as an Inmate (Guest Blog by Tommy Chandler)
Tommy Chandler went to the Denver
Detention Center two times this year for 54 and 55 days. One was a theft charge
and the other was urinating in public. He is 44 years old and 93 days sober
after using meth and marijuana for 33 years. He wrote this in jail:
The
bricks have no warmth here, nothing but the cold reality surrounding you. Caged
in like the mighty lion that got caught, his instincts slowly fading away. Your
aching back is begging for freedom again. Until then nothing but a cold metal
bunk bed with a two-inch-thick broken-down mat is all you get. The loud snoring
in both cells on each side has you sandwiched into never-ending sleepless
nights.
Once
a week, most look forward to commissary day. Some will be smiling like kids on
Christmas, others just sitting enviously like kids in the corner that Santa
forgot, wishing they would have heard their name called to go get their bag of
goodies.
Loneliness
constantly creeps into your mind and heart. But you’re never alone as you’re
constantly surrounded by other inmates and guards. Most of whom couldn’t care
whether you existed or not.
Few
inmates can remember phone numbers of contacts in their cell phones. Those that
can need their friends or family to prepay phone time to accept collect calls.
Unfortunately, most have burned everyone outside due to drugs, bad behavior and
bad decisions. So phone calls and visits are rare.
The
food is repetitive and lacks in so many ways they just call it chow. It is
served three times a day. There is a twelve-hour span between your last meal
that day and breakfast the next morning. So your options are to starve, save
and hide food for a snack later or eat commissary. Some pitch in together and
combine items to make spreads, giving them something that tastes good and fills
stomachs until the next meal. The hungry ones sit watching and wishing they
could join in, almost like that little fat kid who didn’t get picked to play
ball.
Once
a week, you get a clean uniform and linens. First you turn in your dirty ones.
Then before being given clean ones, everyone is put out into the courtyard.
Then the guards search the entire place. They rummage through everyone’s
belongings, making a mess to clean up, confiscating items not issued to you or
bought through commissary, removing anything extra that might provide comfort,
individuality, or a sense of home until your release.
This
wasn’t written to complain or condemn the system, jails or prisons in any way.
Reform and retraining grown adults is not easy to do. I commend all you
officers trying to do your best to enforce our laws and protect our rights.
What I am saying is if you have ever done drugs, domestic violence, been
abusive, or if you just plain keep making bad choices and bad decisions, then
please change or this will be your life as an inmate.
Prisoner Art Exhibition in London
For the next two months, the annual Koestler Trust exhibition of prisoner art is in the Royal Festival Hall at the Southbank Centre, London. Entrance is free, so please come along. Here are some photos, mainly from the space I curated. I chose mostly portraits and my theme ended up being "faces," including the clock-face painting. I made a brief appearance on BBC Vietnam. Unless you speak Vietnamese, you won't be able to understand it, but you get a good view of the prisoner art at the exhibition. Here's the clip.
Shaun Attwood
 |
| With Tim Robertson, CEO Koestler Trust |
 |
| Paul Denham's winning entry |
 |
| With Molly Denham, mother of the blind artist Paul Denham |
From T-Bone (Letter 31)
T-Bone is a massively-built spiritual ex-Marine, who uses fighting skills to stop prison rape. T-Bone’s latest letter:
They put a guy in our pod who had got into a fight in the kitchen. He said he had to fight a guy because several of the food workers were coughing and sneezing over the food as it was being prepared. In front of everyone in here, I asked him if that was going on all the time and he said yes.
They put a guy in our pod who had got into a fight in the kitchen. He said he had to fight a guy because several of the food workers were coughing and sneezing over the food as it was being prepared. In front of everyone in here, I asked him if that was going on all the time and he said yes.
When they served chow after that, everyone
walked over to the trash can and dropped their trays in. That got the guards’
attention. Shortly after that, the commander came up here with the Strategic Response
Team (goon squad). He said that the food was safe to eat, so I said please eat
it then. Twenty guards looked at him. He wouldn’t eat it.
So a sergeant picked up a tray, looked
at it, took a bite and stopped. He extracted a piece of wood from his mouth.
The commander turned red and locked us
down. They stripped us naked, had us sit down with our hands on our heads and pepper-sprayed
four prisoners. They took those four to lockdown. The commander said if he
heard any more out of us, he would lock us down for a week.
Word got out to some of the other pods and
all hell broke loose with the other prisoners over the food. Sheriff Joe Arpaio
is crazy feeding us this stuff that is so nasty.
I still want to grab some of these
jokers in my pod by the neck and make them tell me who stole my stuff and make
them pay me, but I’m going to wait on God because that’s what my heart is
saying to do.
My leg is much better. I had to stop a
situation the other day, but I’ll write about that later.
Shaun Attwood
From T-Bone (Letter 30)
T-Bone is a massively-built spiritual ex-Marine, who uses fighting skills to stop prison rape. T-Bone’s latest letter:
Things have been on edge for some time
now because of the racist attitudes a lot of these guys have here. Apparently
the “fellas,” the guys who are in charge, who call the shots for the Mexicans
and the whites, said that none of their race can live with a black man. The
Mexicans and the whites will back each other up on this rule and will even riot
over it.
They moved a Native American guy in with
me and all hell almost broke out because I am black. I said, “Why are you guys
tripping? Why do you act like black people have an incurable disease or
something?”
The Native American guy moved out and
the guards moved a white guy in and the same thing happened. I couldn’t care
less what colour a person is.
The next thing that happened was a butt
bandit came up to me and said that a gay white boy in our pod is his, and that
I need to mind my own business if he wants to take him in the shower.
I said I couldn’t care less what he did
with his own body and all I can do is tell him the truth about things.
So the gay kid went into the shower with
him, and there were three other guys wanting their turn. I was in my cell,
reading, when someone yelled T-bone. I walked out and looked towards where the
yell came from.
The butt bandit and his friends saw me
and stopped. The gay kid came by my cell and said thank you, before rolling out
of the pod.
It’s a huge misconception in here that
gay people want to be harmed and/or gang raped because they are gay.
After we came off lockdown, I talked to
those guys. It simply came down to them not having the spirit of self-control.
One of them came up to me and tried to
take advantage of the fact that I am a Christian. He started yelling at me,
saying that I owed him this and that and he got up in my face. I didn’t owe
that guy anything at all. He was trying to play me with the old game of testing
me. He made a move like he was going to hit me and down he went.
I know I have a long way to go. A looooooong way to go. Self-control!
I know I have a long way to go. A looooooong way to go. Self-control!
Shaun Attwood
Greetings from the Abyss by Jack (Part 20)
Jack is serving life without parole, and has terminal cancer. Throughout my incarceration, Jack was a positive influence. He encouraged me to keep writing, to enter short-story competitions, and we proofread each other’s chapters. Jack is seeking pen pals, so anyone interested please email me at attwood.shaun@hotmail.co.uk for his details.
It has been a rough go this last few
months or so. I have had two rather nasty bouts where my pain has gone off the
scale. The first was the last week in May. I had got up at my usual time of 4
AM to catch the BBC broadcast of world news, and get ready for work, when the
usual pain began to escalate rapidly. In a matter of just a few minutes I was
in absolute agony. It felt like some demented animal was trying to claw its way
out of my body.
The officer came through to do the 4 AM headcount
and saw me. He then activated an ICS emergency and requested a medical turnout.
By the time medical showed up, I was drenched in sweat, my breathing was rapid
and shallow, and I was unable to focus or respond to the most general of questions.
Medical, then loaded me in the van and
carted me off to the HUB, where they accessed my chemo port and began pushing
IV solutions of various drugs. They drew a gallon or so of blood (well it felt
like a gallon considering how many vials they took) and put a rush on the results
so that they could better understand how to treat me.
The rush results were returned
approximately 10 hours later. During that time, they continued to force the
various generic IV solutions into me. Somewhere around hour six, the pain began
to recede and eventually it re-established itself in its usual area and level. When
my test results did return the doctor stated that “my numbers were wonky, but
they did not explain why I was experiencing such severe pain.”
Because my pain had return to its usual
level, Medical decided to send me back to the yard and follow up with the
assigned nurse practitioner (who earlier cancelled my painkillers) for further
testing.
Shaun Attwood
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